I woke up tired and sore from a night of unsound achy sleep and reflected on this pregnancy journey. It has been Good, Moving, frustrating, painful, Great, Happy, lonely, ugly, angering, tearful, tiring, Joyous, Empowering, Wonderful and Exciting; most importantly a true Blessing.
My head is filled with so many thoughts and and my heart with so many emotions I thought I would write them down/type them out. Though I’m sure many other thoughts will come as the day goes on, as the days move forward and I reflect back, different things that will pop up in my head, but for now these are my thoughts in this moment, waking up today.
It’s week 36, time to really mentally prepare myself. It may be my 5th child coming but no woman is an expert or a “veteran” (I can’t stand being called that), or has it all in the bag because they’ve done it before. One should never assume because a woman has had a child before that they know what they are doing and have everything under control, it doesn’t work like that. Every pregnancy is different, every birth is different and every time there are new experiences. The pain is never the same, the length in time, your body doesn’t react the same way every time and your mental and emotional state may not be the same depending where you are in your life. These all are key factors in how our experience will be because all our senses and feelings are heightened to a next level. Growing a human being inside your body cavity, internal organs being shifted, joints softening, connected joints and bones disconnecting, muscles separating, skin changing, bowels working slower, veins being constricted, boosted blood supply, higher body temperature, the need to take in way more healthy calories, over powering hunger, working twice as hard to do simple things like breathing, walking , bending, turning, lifting legs, sleeping and sleeping comfortably, muscle cramps, joints swelling, feet swelling even hands, over production of gases, your bladder being squished, your spine curving, your center of gravity is off, your body trying it’s best compensate for what is happening and weight being added on to your body while your growing child is doing the same thing (plus the weight of your growing uterus, amniotic fluid sac and placenta.
Carrying and birthing a human being into the world is never easy and should never be looked at as such. It doesn’t necessarily get easier with the more children you have or harder, it all depends on the woman and well, life. Each experience is a new journey where you are literally learning all over again. Old fears may come back, new fears may develop and new joys may develop as well, or what was once joyous may leave. You never know what to expect all the time and what you think you’ll expect may change at any time. It’s a daily mission of physical, psychological, emotional and spiritual strength for 9 months (or less) and then another chapter comes into play where you start again and progress to the next continued level of learning. Emotional, mental and physical support during this time is essential to a woman’s well being and ability to endure the journey she is going through and have a pleasant and wonderful pregnancy and birth experience. Symptoms and sometimes physical ailments are not timed, calculated, done on purpose by the woman, they can’t be controlled and you don’t just get over it. This is our bodies telling us things and giving us messages that only we can feel. The fact that only us as pregnant women can feel these things sometimes makes it harder for us to get the comfort we need or want. Sometimes even expressing these things may not be enough for others to understand what you are going through or what you may need. Senses are heightened, emotions are in overdrive and all forms of balance are off balance and aside from all this we still strive to maintain the state we were in before pregnancy; this can be a tough task most days and can be dangerous, as we may feel the affects of it later on in the day or the next day.
If you’ve never been pregnant, don’t know the importance the whole experience and risks that come along with it or are not a woman, many of these things I am mentioning will be hard to fully grasp. Even if you are a father, many of these things you may know but not fully comprehend as well as you think. It is easy to think you understand by reading or hearing these things, but until you’ve gone through it or have allowed yourself or offered yourself to be apart of ALL aspects of a woman’s pregnancy, you’ll never get it and overall will never get it 100%. The idea of understanding and remembering that these 9 months are the most strongest and also the most weakest time of a woman’s life isn’t always grasped. It is easy to forget that the farther long a woman gets in her pregnancy the less she should be stressing about or straining to do and should really be focusing on preparing her mind and body for her birth; we women tend to forget this too. Usually we have to be reminded to rest, sleep, take it easy, put our feet up, take the weight of our joints etc. because once the baby is born it is a whole other level of support we will be needing and I hope women are getting that. However, I do know many do not have the support that is so much needed but are still doing amazing jobs regardless. We must also remember we are individuals. What maybe easy for one may not be easy for another. Being of the same gender does not mean we all take on things the same way or can handle things the same way, and it is nothing to be ashamed of or be compared too.
Do what you can, how you can, the best you can and most importantly if you can’t do it or don’t feel to do it and it’s not important, either don’t do it (the world won’t end) or take the help from those that want to help you, especially when asking may be a hard option for you. I must say, I do enjoy being pregnant, most of the experience is very joyous, while there are many things about being pregnant I wish I could change and make for an even better and easier experience. However, when the 9 months is up, it’s up and it’s time to move forth onto the next journey of now nurturing and getting know this newly born person, ensuring it’s first experience into this new world is as wonderful as it can be and continues to be as they grow and develop.
The Artistik Domestician 